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Monday, December 31, 2012

Super Bowltrix Sunday



OH Shit! My Niners won today! Go Niners! We did it! Arizona didn't stand a chance. We demolished them!

We? We didn't do a damn thing. We didn't practice. We didn't spend every single breathing moment dedicated to Football. No We didn't. All WE did was give money, women, cars, drugs, mansions... the list goes on and on. We give everything  to athletes  . Hell We will fight our family for our team.
" Who's got 5 Superbowls! Oh shit, MY TEAM BITCH! NOW TELL YOUR KICKER TO KILL HIMSELF AS WITH YOUR COACH... BITCH!  Now, get out of my face or I am going to break your neck bro."-I know someone would've said Mom or Grandma here but I am not going for the cheap laugh. I actually want to earn it.

We will stand and be proud of our team. We will dedicate our lives for our team.  Because our team is us and we are them. We are Football.

Now don't get me wrong, I love watching football. It's a great sport to watch and it does bring people together for bbqs, Drink Pepsi and hang out.  I think that's a great thing to have. But The NFL has done something more. They made into a LIVELY HOOD. A way of life. From Fantasy Football to Madden Online, ESPN,  Red Zone, NFL Ticket,  the list goes on and on. Corporate America did it yet again and I am tired of it. They watered down everything they can get out of a sport and make it into what Christmas has become. Something you fucking hate.

"I love the Super Bowl. Even if my team isn't in it, I'll still watch it because of the commercials. They're fucking funny!'

Anyone watches the Superbowl because of that reason is a moron. I raise my hand first for I am one of them. But my eyes are open and I see that the Superbowl has become The Matirx. A false reality that the machine tells you what to do and what to wear,  and what  better way to brainwash the masses on a day  the whole World will watch. I say don't watch. Even if you're team is in it.  Unplug yourself from the Bowltrix. Yes I,   no I am not Neo; but I am telling you this. Unplug yourself. Unplug yourself on Superbowltrix Sunday and not watch it. Turn off your TV. Walk away. And do something else. 

" NOT WATCH THE SUPERBOWL, YOU'RE FUCKING CRAZY"

No I am normal. And try to relax, you'll hear how it went from someone else. Or you can watch the highlights or watch it when it becomes a NFL Classic. Basically, you can always watch the Superbowl at any time.

But now I am starting a new tradition. A new Holiday.  And on this day, you do something else. Create something. Watch a movie, or write a movie, or even and this might be a little off ... play football. But don't forget to greet others this:   " Merry Bowltrix. You're mind is clear."

Go Niners!


Monday, December 10, 2012

Sanduskified


Kablamo... No not today.

As you know, Christmas is amongst us. O yes tis time of year where we celebrate the birth of Christ and Santa Claus. Most people don't believe in Santa Claus because they are conflicted with their religion. God vs Man Made God, but hasn't that always been the problem.  The problem with Santa Claus is that he has became a different symbol. Santa's changed. He became more than just a Holly Jolly, Drink Coke, be good children Santa is always watching you .This last one always freaks me out.  Sure kids believe in a perverted man that watches your every move and if you're a really good boy or girl Santa will give you a present. Too Sanduskish. That's right Santa Claus is now Sanduskified. There ya go.  A new word has been created.


                                                                                 
                                                                                 


Sanuskified/ san-DUS-ke-fied/ : a noun;
1.  Too friendly or too nice
2. Over use of showers with children.
3. A Fucking Pervert!
Created by Mike Betancourt   Don't Smile Productions. Copyright. 2012(c). All rights reserved.




Santa needs to go away for a while. That way, we need to  teach our children about  naughty or nice. And not rely on Santa's watching you be good. How about I'M WATCHING YOU, BE GOOD. I'M YOUR PARENT AND YOU NEED TO LISTEN TO ME. I AM TEACHING YOU.

Bingo! There's our problem.  We as adults has forgotten how to be teachers. Remember, it takes a community to raise a child. No one wants to help any more, no one cares about Christmas. If you really cared about Christmas, don't buy any thing. Create something. Write a song. Make something instead of buy something. Buying something is quick and easy to do. When you make something that comes from the heart and you have to think more about that person. I know, most of you are not creative, but you can ask around.
Look it up online. Creative ideas. See to create something, that requires an imagination and ideas. Ideas keeps our minds sharp. Having our minds sharp is exactly what ADVERTISERS DON'T WANT YOU TO DO. Advertisers, sorry I meant who's controlling us. Oh great Mike here we go again, you're the next person that is talking about controlled government. I am sick and tired of hearing this.

Well good, you should be tired of hearing this. And don't worry I wont preach about The Government. The Goverment! It's All The Goverments fault! Just know this folks. This system is broken. It doesn't work any more. It's all an illusion. So don't worry about a thing when this system finally crashes. Sure it might suck for a bit, but we are the ones that will go down in history. We are the ones that will sacrifice our lives for our children. Our children's will live in an absolute perfect society. And that's ok. This one sucks anyways, so why have our children see any more. It's done. Unplugged.

 Ahh unplugged. That was such a great show. Watching LLCoolJ telling the band to rewind that shit. Classic! Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Dave Matthews Band. Unplugged was the shit .MTV in general was the shit, not MTV now. Fuck no! FUCK MTV! I hate it now. It wasn't like it use to be. Remote Control, Liquid TV, Half Hour Comedy Hour, Yo MTV Raps!, Headbangers Ball. Beavis and Butthead, The Oddities, Aeon's Flux,

MIKE STOP! You're ranting, You went from God, Santa, End of the world, and MTV? Where are you going with this blog?

I don't know.

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Good Day Sacramento: The Mikes ( Mike Betancourt is on TV! )


Hey Everyone! In cased you missed it. Here's me and The Mikes on TV!

Monday, December 3, 2012

The Mikes was a success!



Kablamo!

Yes ladies and gents. The Mikes first show was a huge success! Everyone did extremely well. You don't want to miss out on The Mikes.

If you don't know who The Mikes are no worries. The Mikes  is not me talking about the voices I hear in my head. Or type while. I was getting to that. Sorry. Or type. The Mikes is a 5 comedian group, and all of us are named Mike.5 different comics with 5 different styles.  Pretty simple. Allow me to introduce all the Mikes. Wait I thought I was. You are. Ok.



Mike Sinclair. The Soooul Brother. His mind is so sharp that glass breaks when he walks by. 










Michael Calvin Jr. The Mouth: Enough said. 

















Mike Osborn: The Heart. He may seem cute and cuddly but if you put him in a corner he'll fight his way out because he's got The Heart of a lion. 










Michael O'Connell. The Mastermind. He's the genius that came up with this  Mike idea. He may be in a wheel chair, but he's been wheeling and dealing making sure The Mikes go nation wide. 








and Me. You mean us. Yes, us. Mike Betancourt: The Mayhem. How about crazy. Mike stop, you are messing up this blog. Oh shit sorry they are still reading. Yes, please leave. 













We are The Mikes and we had a great show. No means are we being a showboat saying we killed and demolished the crowd. And we are GREAT because we have a following. Hell NO! Without the people supporting us ,  all of us working hard coming together, all the promotions, this show would not have been a success if none of these components all worked out. Thank you everyone who made this show possible. Even if you were not there, most of you told friends and pass the word along. Thank you very much ! 

The Mikes will continue to grow and have more dates to come. Be sure to hang tight. As far as me, Mike Betancourt, I am still working on other projects too: Funny Bunny, scripts, sketches, and of course my Youtube channel---- INSERT CHANNEL NOW-----www.youtube.com/mikebcomedy . But here and on Youtube I will be promoting the Mikes. 

Don't forget The Mikes were on Good Day Sacramento: 

Stay tuned FOR  MORE MIKES ....the group... and The crazy one! (notice Mike is wearing the same shirt. He doesn't have a lot of clothes) 

Peach out! 

Thursday, November 29, 2012

MIKE BETANCOURT IS ON TV!

Hello Fellow bloggers, check me and the rest of The Mikes on Good Day Sacramento. Also, please come to our show tomorrow night. At the Sacramento Comedy Spot!
5 Mike Comedians « Good Day Sacramento

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Sunday, November 25, 2012

We are The Mikes


Wait one damn second! Wait a freaking minute! Hold the phone, ipad, and tablet. You mean to tell me that there's more than one Mike? Yes, five comedians named Mike and sharing one stage. Sounds like a boy band. Very funny Mike, but the difference between  One Direction, O-Town, 98 degrees, NKOTB, Backstreet Boys, NSYNC,   and Menudo, is that The Mikes guarantee one laugh. Everything else is a bonus. Plus these Mikes have talent and don't need auto-tune to enlighten a crowd. You didn't make fun of New Edition. Lay off the Candy Girl, that's a masterpiece!

So who are The Mikes?

Michael O'Connell, The Mastermind: The genius that came up with the idea of putting The Mikes together. He may be in a wheelchair but he's been wheelin and dealing making The Mikes nationwide.

Mike Osborn, The Heart: He may seem cute and cuddly, but you put him in a corner he will fight his way out because he has a heart of a lion.

Michael Calvin Jr, The Mouth: A man that can spit game faster than anyone can stutter. ( He stutters that's why it's  funny)

Mike Sinclair, The Soul: A soul brother, do we need another? Also, Sinclair has been making a huge impact in Hollywood.( As seen on CSI NY)

Mike Betancourt, The Mayhem: The crazy one, the loose cannon, the wild card, the only one who talks and answers to himself. Right Mike? Yes sir.

I guess we are like a boy band. Hmm who would of thunk it. Watch our debut show November 30th at the Sacramento Comedy Spot 9pm.  For more info about The Mikes go to www.saccomedyspot.com

There will be many more shows, many more blogs, many more TV spots(We are all going to be on Good Day Sacramento Friday November 29th, set your DVR now!) but no one is going to forget the first time The Mikes set foot on stage together .

Witness The Beginning. Witness, The Mikes

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Sunday, November 18, 2012

The Blog is Back!

Mike Betancourt is back in the blogging world. Wow there is a ton of cobwebs here. Crap! Wait Mike, I thought you were blogging already. Aren't you Funny Bunny? Yes and no. He's my alter ego but not a lot of people are fans of The Bunny. I have to build the comedy side as well as the Horror side. Wow two sides to Mike? Ha you have no idea. I think I have an idea. Ok stop bugging me I need to get back to the fans. Oh sorry. Go ahead. Mike Betancourt fans I am changing my fan club name. It will No longer be the Mike B Comedy fans. Too damn long. If you are a fan of Mike Betancourt that means you here and now are officially a member of THE BETANCOURT BRIGADE! I finally went public with this name on YouTube. Check out Open Open Mike Episode 16: Mike, you're not suppose to plug yourself until the end of the blog. Will you please stop interrupting me? This link was explaining The Betancourt Brigade. Yeah but you could of easily said that at the end. Let me write how I want too ok. Go ahead. Thank you.

Anyways, The Betancourt Brigade is a fan base, if you belong to The Betancourt Brigade you will be on a guest list to any show that I am. Wow cool! I know . How does one actually become a member of The Betancourt Brigade? Just send me a message www.facebook.com/mikebcomedy. All you have to say is " Finkle Flam Floom Flock" and you are in. Wow perfect. See, isn't pretty easy to plug while I blog. I guess you're right Mike. I am sorry for ever doubting you. No problem, we are not perfect. Stay tuned Brigade! More exiting stuff coming your way. Don't for get to catch me live at The Sacramento Comedy Spot more info go to http://saccomedyspot.com/mikes/ Is there anything else you need to plug Mike, you walking billboard you. Stop dude you've been  bugging me this whole time I lost my train of thought and I wasted their time.

Oh yeah don't forget to subscribe and if you are a fan of Horror you should visit Funny Bunny

www.youtube.com/funnybunnytv187
 
Nice banner Mike, you should get one for yourself. Shut up dude.