Saturday, August 28, 2010
Lex Luthor For President!
ATTENTION MBB'S This just in from The Daily Planet " Lex Luthor is running for President in 2012!"
That's right citizens of America, Superman's arch nemesis, Lex Luthor, may possibly be our next President. The Luthor campaign has immediately come up with a slogan " Vote for Lex Luthor; He doesn't promise Hope, He promises Results." Since then his approval rating has skyrocketed faster than Superman can reach a tall building in a single bound. Many citizens and voters are extremely happy that Lex Luthor is here to change America.
Clark Kent quoted today " Superman will also be running for President in 2012. As Superman's Ad Campaign manager his slogan will be : I'm Always Around." Citizens of Metropolis replied with a comment that is widely spreading everywhere " We Don't Need A Hero, We Need a A**Hole! "
Lex Luthor has a three part plan to restore America. His first order of business is to bring back the economy. Anyone who is collecting unemployment or welfare will be now a agriculture worker and paid minimum wage. With states like Michgan, Rhode Island and California, minimum wage ( due to inflation) will be changed to $25 dollars and hour, which will give all other brackets an upgrade.
Next order of business is the war in Iraq. Lex Luthor has decided to add three more branches to the armed forces. They are : X men, The Avengers and Justice Leauge of America. Lex Luthor stated to DC Universe " Our country is in peril, DC and Marvel Universe will put their differences aside for the greater good of America. My Secretary of Defense will be Captain America. I have good faith that he will lead this new military to victory ."
Lex Luthor has mass produced exoskeleton suits (which he used to fight against Superman) to all armed forces. He added a new heat seeking system that detects Al Qaeda . According to military analyst; this will eliminate any innocent by standers and the War on Terror will be over with in two months.
" Wow that's faster than a P90X" Louise Lane - Daily Planet
Finally; for the environment, Luthor has asked the help from Mr. Freeze and Professor X to restore Planet Earth by researching the cosmo's for inter planetary elements. These elements will give cleaner air and cure anyone that has Mesothelioma. Silver Surfer and Doomsday are pursing the universe for any adaptable element that matches Planet Earth. Lex Luthor has made his clone Vice President to continue his legacy and prevent any assassination attempt. He also funded his campaign and donated nearly a trillion dollars to the Shiner's Hospital, which is renamed Shrex Luthor Hospital.
With his final quote before his trip to Gotham City, he states " If you want a real Superman, Vote For Lex!"
Mike Betancourt- The Comic's Comic.